k, refresh my memory. you have SOLE custody, he has no rights but visitation, is that right? and what does the order say about where he can and cannot pick up the child?
why can't your ex get the child off the bus, his schedule? If it is his parenting time then he needs to appoint someone to do it, like his aunt, mother, brother, or girl friend.
You do not have to put up with him being verbally abusive but don't put yourself in the position where the court feels that you are the one interefering with him getting his child. If he keeps being very abusive then you could have YOUR mother, sister, aunt, cousing, or boy friend hand the child over.......or yhou could get a restraining order if he is at all threatening.